Defense etiquette

Photo: Women marching for equality in the 70's.

The History:

The code of chivalry was a code comprised of moral principles used to govern the lives of noblemen. The principles included, but were not limited to: protecting the weak and defenseless, fighting for the welfare of all, respecting the honour of women, and to abstaining from unfairness/meanness. These regulations all basically meant one thing: do the 'right' thing.

When faced with ethical dilemmas the knights, clad in shining armor, were obligated by the code of chivalry to do the right thing. They were called to protect those that may not have been able to protect themselves. In medieval times women would have fallen into this category. Historically, women lacked the basic human rights, education, and social standing that would have allowed them to come to their own defense.  

Therefore, this role would have fallen into the lap of men (most likely an armored, horseback lap). Men, according to the code of chivalry, were responsible for protecting and defending women from injustice, offense, and/or attack.

*Aside: this is slightly ironic due to the fact that Medieval society, social codes and customs were built upon deep seated power imbalances.  Even by the code of chivalry itself. Women were treated unjustly, and offensively. In an ironic twist, therefore, knights would technically be responsible for fighting the very power structures that gave them the power to do so.*

The Custom:

The damsel in distress being saved by her knight in shining armor is a well-known archetype. The custom being evaluated is just that: should men come to the aid of their female counterparts? Should men stand up, stand behind, or stay out of behavior which is offensive or unjust?

It was long customary for men to come to the defense of women, but recently this has fallen by the way side. There is a lot of speculation that this is because men do not want to appear sexist. That maybe jumping to a woman’s defense implies she is incapable of mounting her own.

The Verdict: LOVE IT (a custom worth defending)

Defending women, or any person when you have the ability to do so is immensely important. People empowered and disempowered by structures, customs, or cultures must collectively work towards a positive change.

Being a passive is an act of silent praise; a show of support. By staying silent in these types of situations one is condoning the behavior in question.

It is important for everyone to stand together. Regardless of gender, or sex it important for people to defend one another. This is especially important today with the rise of bullying, murders in the LGBTQ community, and youth suicides.

Stay tuned for new posts each week!

**If you or anyone you know needs assistance the following resources are available:
Domestic Violence Support
Suicide Prevention
Anti-bullying/kids help

Walking Etiquette

Photo: Couple walking arm in arm

The History:
Historically, swords were sheathed on the right side and hung at a mans waist. This was due to the fact that the majority of people are right handed. It allowed quick access to a person's weapon. Back when danger could be lurking around any corner, or within any passing glance this was important.

The Custom:

The proper way to escort a lady is for the man to offer her his left arm. Thus, freeing up his right arm and allowing him to protect the honor, and safety of his lady friend. This tradition still applies indoors. However, the industrial revolution added a new problem into the equation: cars. 

With the rise of motorized, or wheeled vehicles etiquette had to evolve. It is now considered proper for a man to position himself closest to the street with the female farthest away from the traffic. This would protect her from physical harm, and hopefully any dirt/water splashing up on her clothes.

The Verdict: LOVE IT (runaway success )

I think offering a woman any arm is something worth bringing back, and so I say this act of chivalry deserves a comeback.

It is slightly problematic to assume that women still need to be protected by a male figure. But, I think this is a relatively harmless social custom that doesn't infringe on the autonomy of anyone.


Stay tuned for more. There will be a new post every week!