Door Etiquette

Photo: the front end of a vintage car

The History:

There are, in fact, a number of historical reasons behind men holding the door open for women. Today, we will explore the main reasons: the ancient code of chivalry, and female fashion. In order to get to the heart of this custom it makes sense to begin, at well, the beginning. The medieval code of chivalry demanded that knights/gentlemen protect those weaker, or lesser, than themselves.

Also, it should be noted that female fashion has not historically been the most practical. Women wore dresses with corsets, hoop skirts, and many more layers which tended to make it awkward to maneuver about . Women, at times, simply needed help negotiating their way through doorways.

The custom:

When staring down an open door it is not uncommon to hear the statement "ladies first," and so we have arrived at the custom. "Women and children first," applied, originally, in situations where harm or danger was imminent. 

The vulnerable, weaker people would be saved first in this seemingly 'noble' act. For example: on the titanic women and children boarded the life boats first until it was deemed the boats were at capacity

In our modern life of relative safety it is no longer common to find oneself in a situation where harm or danger looms. Women's priority boarding has shifted from the life boats of yesterday, to buildings or cars. Offering to open a door for women is how this tradition evolved.

However, offering to open a car door for a women is a pregnant action. It not only bears all of the historical significance previously discussed, but much more. Men would walk to the passenger door for two reasons: men were the assumed drivers, and women could not always drive cars. These reasons were built upon deeply embedded gendered stereotypes.

The Verdict: LEAVE IT (that door is better left shut)

Anything which is predicated on the fact women are the weaker sex, and can't drive should be left in the past. That being said: I think people, in general, should open the door for everyone.

If someone is right behind you take an extra two seconds and brighten someone's day. But the dated stereotypes and female first mentality should be shut out.

Stay tuned for a new post next week!

Walking Etiquette

Photo: Couple walking arm in arm

The History:
Historically, swords were sheathed on the right side and hung at a mans waist. This was due to the fact that the majority of people are right handed. It allowed quick access to a person's weapon. Back when danger could be lurking around any corner, or within any passing glance this was important.

The Custom:

The proper way to escort a lady is for the man to offer her his left arm. Thus, freeing up his right arm and allowing him to protect the honor, and safety of his lady friend. This tradition still applies indoors. However, the industrial revolution added a new problem into the equation: cars. 

With the rise of motorized, or wheeled vehicles etiquette had to evolve. It is now considered proper for a man to position himself closest to the street with the female farthest away from the traffic. This would protect her from physical harm, and hopefully any dirt/water splashing up on her clothes.

The Verdict: LOVE IT (runaway success )

I think offering a woman any arm is something worth bringing back, and so I say this act of chivalry deserves a comeback.

It is slightly problematic to assume that women still need to be protected by a male figure. But, I think this is a relatively harmless social custom that doesn't infringe on the autonomy of anyone.


Stay tuned for more. There will be a new post every week!